One Shabbos the Gabbai of the shul calls Greenberg up for
Haggba (lifting the Torah). Unfortunately, Greenberg is not
exactly strong. As you can probably guess, he almost dropped
the Torah. He was so embarrassed, that he vowed never to let
that happen again. So right after Shabbos he joined a health
club. He started pumping iron, taking aerobics, ballet etc.
Well sure enough after six months, the Gabbai calls him up
to the Torah. Greenberg runs up, grabs the Torah, open it
seven columns throws it in the air does a double flip, and
catches it behind his back. He turns to the Gabbai, "Nu, how
was that" The Gabbai responded," great, but you had maftir.