Thanksgiving Outlook

by Elliot Abrams

  Turkeys will thaw in the morning, then warm in the oven to an
  afternoon high near 190 F. The kitchen will turn hot and humid, and if
  you bother the cook, be ready for a severe squall or cold shoulder.

  During the late afternoon and evening, the cold front of a knife will
  slice through the turkey, causing an accumulation of one to two inches
  on plates. Mashed potatoes will drift across one side while cranberry
  sauce creates slippery spots on the other. Please pass the gravy.

  A weight watch and indigestion warning have been issued for the entire
  area, with increased stuffiness around the beltway. During the
  evening, the turkey will diminish and taper off to leftovers, dropping
  to a low of 34 F in the refrigerator.

  Looking ahead to Friday and Saturday, high pressure to eat sandwiches
  will be established. Flurries of leftovers can be expected both days
  with a 50 percent chance of scattered soup late in the day. We expect
  a warming trend where soup develops. By early next week, eating
  pressure  will be low as the only wish left will be the bone.

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