Kiddie Anecdotes



Every Saturday morning Grandpa Walt found himself babysitting his
three grandchildren...all boys. The kids always wanted to play ''war''
and Grandpa somehow always got coaxed into the game. His daughter came
to pick up the kids early one Saturday and witnessed Grandpa take a
fake shot as Jason pointed a toy gun and yelled, Bang!'' Grandpa
slumped to the floor and stayed there motionless. The daughter rushed
over to see if he was alright. Grandpa opened one eye and whispered,
''Sh-h-h, I always do this. It's the only chance I get to rest.''

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8-year-old Daniel heard his grandmother tell his mother that a
football was needed for the family dinner Sunday night. Daniel
couldn't imagine why, but if he could help grandma prepare the meal,
he would. But he didn't have a football, so he went over to Greg's
house and traded 50 baseball cards for an old deflated football. He
pumped it up, shined it and placed it on the kitchen table waiting for
grandma to discover it. ''Daniel!'' his mother exclaimed, ''You know
Grandma is cooking tonight. Please put your things where they
belong!'' Daniel was holding back the tears, ''But it's for Grandma!
She said she needed a football for dinner.'' Mother did her best to
hold back the laughter, ''You know Grandma and her Irish accent. She
meant a FRUIT BOWL!''

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One Saturday morning a suburban Nashville grandmother remarked to her
neighbor that she was going to get her 12-year-old grandson to wash
the car when he came over to visit. Not to be outdone, the neighbor
lady bragged that her 8-year-old grandson would pick up tree limbs
that were scattered around the yard. You guessed it. An hour later one
grandma was washing a car while the other was picking up branches.

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The Bennett family had just moved into the neighborhood and was
anxious to make a good impression. But the neighbors seemed busy and
not interested. One day Matthew, their youngest boy, ran into the
house and announced, ''Ma, a lady down the street just asked me my
name!'' Mother replied, ''Great! And then what happened?'' Matthew
said, ''Oh, she gave it to the policeman.''

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