by Rich Hall
I forgot to tell you. Intense discussion doesn't create two-way
intimacy. Saying, "We need to talk about our relationship. I think
there's a problem," might draw you closer to your boyfriend, but it
makes him _nervous_. "Why is she talking about the relationship?" he
thinks. "She should be talking about me!"
But if you said, "We need to talk about the refrigerator. I think
there's a problem," he would perk right up.
Women achieve intimacy through intense conversation.
Men achieve intimacy through making sandwiches.
Ask a guy to recall an intimate moment (other than sex), and he'll
probably answer something like, "When my girlfriend and I made Spam and
Men cannot experience intimacy unless snacks are involved. Thus, if you
want him to address the relationship, it has to be while you're making
Write down what you want from the relationship on 3 x 5 cards"
"Affection," "Honesty," "Communication," whatever... Take the 3 x 5
cards and plaster them over the labels of all your condiments, like
mayonnaise or pickle relish.
It's only a matter of time before he'll be asking concernedly, "Hey,
where's all the affection?" or "We need more commitment."