Become a Better Liar
It's Easy!

Just follow these 12 steps

1) First of all, minimize your lies.  If you lie all the time, people
	will never believe you.

2) Try to cry while you're lying.  Everyone believes someone who's 	crying.

3) Always swear to god (not G-d with a capital "G"'ll be 	punished
	severely!)  Little "g" god can mean Zeus or Poseidon 
	or Money.

4) Emphasize each word (e.g. I...SWEAR...TO...g-D!!!!)

5) Break something (a dish or a vase) if you detect that the 
	listener is even remotely doubting you.

6) Always say: "Ask so-and-so. They'll back me up on this." Be sure 
	to name your best friend, though.  Best friends always side 
	with you whether you're lying or not.

7) Plan out your lie ahead of time. Never ad lib, you'll stutter.

8) Never stutter!

9) Never stay in the same city for more than a few months. People 
	catch on to your line of crap in 2 to 3 months on the average.

10) Don't take chances on lies that can be easily researched. For
	instance, don't say you own Don Quixote's original sword. 
	Your listener might find out that Don Quixote was a fictional

11) Stick to your lie NO MATTER WHAT!!!

12) Try going to law school.  You can make good money, too!

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