Clinton [Pre-Monicagate] Speech Translator
by Terry Peres
Some key definitions to help decode Clinton's speeches. More will be added
as the president's meaning becomes clear. Remember, do not attach
meaning to words, it's symbolism that is important.
all - Clinton's constituency. as: We ALL must make sacrifices
to restore America's economic health.
ask - Clintoneze for legislate. i.e. asking:legislating
campaign - actually, this is a misspelling. It really is champagne
promise promise.
change - (verb) redefinition of the term "tax cut" to its true
meaning, "contribution". (noun) that portion of your
income that will now be heading to Washington, as:
The CHANGE we are asking for is necessary if we are to
restore America's (and, uh, Washington's) economy to number
one in the world.
contribution - that portion of your "excess" income that Washington
believes it can make better use of than you. This
'90s term is designed to make you feel good while
Uncle Sam picks your pocket.
Formerly known unpopularly as "taxes" (shhh. don't say the T
word out loud, it's not politically correct).
courage - ability to perform a humanitarian act or deed without regard
to personal safety or welfare. as: America had the COURAGE
to elect Bill Clinton as president.
first lady - this term has been replaced by the title "co-president"
middle class - that portion of society whose range of income extends from
the end of the poor to the beginning of the wealthy.
Also known as the mule class or the "burdened" class.
poor - what the middle class becomes after it makes
its contribution.
sacrifice - Clintoneze for the act of denying self in order to
make your contribution. as: We must SACRIFICE for
the good of all.
Formerly known as socialism, it has proven itself
effective in places such as China, Cuba, Rumania and
the Soviet Union. One need only talk to citizens
of these nations to see the effect.
spending cuts- What the president promised during his campaign. He will
help you make these by asking you to have the courage to make
your contribution. as: Increased contributions must be
balanced by the appropriate SPENDING CUTS.
we - You, me, us, them. as: You know WE must sacrifice for
the good of all.
Since the president and congress are none of the above,
they are not part of we.
wealthy - anyone making $1.00 a year more than you.
(elected officials are exempt).
This is the class of society that, to quote Commerce
Secretary, Ron Brown, "made out like bandits during the
'80's". Mr. Brown didn't do too shabby himself during that
time. He made hundreds of thousands annually lobbying
congress on behalf of several major Japanese corporations.
Of course now he is just a humble "servant" of the people.